my restraining order dot com - smaller window

This is a great concept.

Iron Man Race 2, Mark 0

I trained, and trained, and trained, in anticipation of the Louisville Iron Man race on August 29, 2010.

My daughter drove down from Ohio, my brother up from Florida, and I flew into Louisville.  The weather was great, right up until the day of the race.  Then the humidity and temperature spiked, deflating the hopes of a lot of racers.

Despite beating my target swim time by a minute or two, and hitting the 23 mile marker at a 17 miles per hour pace, I was unable to finish the bicycle ride.  Drat!  So frustrating.  All those hours of hard work useless on race day.

The front brake had been sticking for awhile.  I took it in to be fixed about a month before the race.  Then, the day before the race, my brother noticed that it was rubbing again.  I took it in to the bike tech and asked him to fix it.  He said he would, and it appeared he had.

My bike hadn't been running so smoothly for months - that is, until I had to use the brakes in a major way.  At about mile 20, there is a large gully that the race goes into and out of, then doubles back into and out again.  The road goes down the side of the gully and it is very steep - brakes definitely required.

Unfortunately, my brake started sticking again and, although I might have figured it out had I been thinking about it, I didn't realize the brake was rubbing until, at about mile 45, I dropped out of the race due to temporary utter exhaustion.  Only about 30 minutes later did I realize that the brake was sticking - but I still didn't know how to fix it.

As I was riding back with four or five other drop outs, one of whom told me it was his tenth Ironman, we reach related the reason we were quitting.  Yes, quitting the race.  When I mentioned my brake was sticking, the veteran said "I think that's happened to us all at one time or another."  While it didn't exactly make me feel like a winner, or even an iron man, I didn't feel quite so much like a loser, a quitter - more like an incompleter.

What did I learn?

I enjoy training for the race.  Lost more than 20 pounds in the last 18 months since I first started training.  I can find time to train - revenues were up from June through September - the months my scheduling was most affected by training, participating, and recovery.

I enjoyed seeing my daughter and brother far more than I enjoyed the race itself.  So, we could have been doing almost anything else and I would have had a great weekend.  My identity, in other words, is not caught up in the race, but rather, truly, the long journey and my relationship to those I love.

There are no guarantees in life.  I trained long and hard, was mentally prepared for the race, and still couldn't complete it.  However, I feel like an ironman - my stamina is way up, my swimming is off the charts (for me), biking is now a breeze, and I'm stronger, lighter, and healthier than I've been in quite awhile.

I was surprised that I was actually a little depressed for several weeks after I got home.   But now I've signed up to do a 25K (I think that's about 15 miles) trail run on Devil Mountain (Mt. Diablo) up in the Bay Area with my other daughter and brother in a couple of weeks. I'm pretty sure I'll finish this race, and have a fun day with family, including my daughter's boyfriend and his parents.

Life is so good.

Camp Pendleton Hard Corps Marathon

Completed this Hard Corps Marathon last Saturday, April 17, 2010.

What a wonderful group of people!  I strongly recommend this marathon for anyone who can complete a rather hilly course in six hours.  The support was outstanding, with plenty of enthusiastic, encouraging, and courteous Marines at every aid station.

There were about 400 runners, and at least that many support people, probably more.  It was so exciting to see the courage and determination of several of the runners in the back who were completing their first marathon.  Two different runners each ran with the American Flag on a pole the entire 26.2 miles.  There was at least one man who ran with a prosthetic lower leg.

Another thing that stood out about this event was that the support men and women held their positions until the very last runner had passed.  When the last runner arrived at the finish line, he had an escort of at least 20 marines, who were jogging in with him and encouraging him.  The last runner got a standing ovation from everyone present - how often do you see that at a race?

The course itself is as it is billed - hard corps.  There were lots of hills, though with an out and back you must always keep telling yourself that for every hill you go up you get to go down.  Miles 21 to 25 constitute one large hill, so one of the challenges is forcing yourself to keep climbing that hill after you have already gone 21 miles - which makes finishing the race on the one flat mile in the entire race even more satisfying.

I was excited to finish in my best time this year 6:07, on a more difficult course.  I was a little worried that my time would not count, as it was over six hours, but relieved that the six hour requirement advertised was primarily to discourage the really slow runners since having too many stragglers would disrupt other activities on the base.  That means I have now qualified to become a Marathon Maniac - three marathons completed within three months.  As they say in the civilian world - hooray!

Another plus is that I discovered Wright socks at REI.  These are double socks that essentially eliminate the normal blisters, as the sock absorbs all of the shifting around, not your skin.  So, no blisters, no lost nails, not even any raw feet - all ofwhich was a big plus.  The orthotics helped keep my knee ligaments from getting too strained on the right side, though my left side may be adjusting to that as it had some new aches.

Something to consider with orthotics.  To wear them, I had to take out the normal cushioning, so the bottom of my feet took more of a pounding and felt a bit bruised for a day or two.  Still, not so much that they affected my run at the time, so a small price to pay for keeping my knees properly aligned throughout the race.

I am so grateful to my incredible older brother, Tim, who encouraged me to enter the Iron Man race last November, for motivating me to start entering races.  I used to think that I would have just as much fun running on my own as in an official event, since at the events I can't really say that I am actually "racing" anyone other than my own previous best time.  I was wrong.  Meeting so many great people, and observing so many others overcome their struggles is far more enjoyable and inspiring.

I thank God that we are able to have so many events organized by private citizens in this country, thankful for the health and time to participate, and thankful for so many wonderful people who come together in a common task.

Marathon Maniacs - here I come!

   I guess I've got the running bug, since I signed up for the Camp Pendleton Marine Corps Marathon scheduled for next Saturday.

   The weather should be great this time of year, but I have to say the course looks extremely demanding - more up and down than any other course I've seen so far - very few flat parts, and very few gently rolling part - mostly fairly steep up and down.  At least the elevation chart appears that way to my amateur eyes.

     In any event, I am really looking forward to it.  I worked real hard last week, and will try to run a very small amount this week.

     I'm also keeping my eye on the race in early May in Lone Pine.  Lone Pine is about as high as Denver, Colorado, but only 200 miles north of Los Angeles.  The race begins at the Whitney Portal, goes UP for a few miles, before gently gliding down for many miles.  At least I've been to the Whitney Portal before, when my older brother and I climbed Mt. Whitney a few years ago.  That course also looks interesting because there are some parts that are single file along a trail - just hope there are no bears on the course!

Los Angeles Marathon - I AM becoming a run-a-holic

Well, on a lark I signed up for the Los Angeles Marathon - it was lots of fun!

Still just as slow as ever, but at least my feet aren't complaining quite as much as after the Pasadena Marathon and my muscles aren't as sore.

It was an awesome sight to see the 25,000 runners begin the race.  The first mile circled the parking lot at Dodger Stadium and the front of the pack had already passed in front of us before my group had even moved a single inch.  I would love to have seen it from the air.

The volunteers were, without exception, really wonderful - which is a little rare when you are several hours back from the lead since they have to be nearly as tired as the runners/walkers.

All of the bands (seemed like one every half mile or so for the first 10 miles) really acted as a distraction, which was nice.  The downhills were really steep, while the uphills were long gradual climbs.

NOW I discover that I am only one marathon away from possibly qualifying as a Marathon Maniac - 3 marathons within 90 days is the minimum qualification.  Will I really go another 26.2 miles for a silly t-shirt?

Pasadena Marathon - am I becoming a run-a-holic?

Completed the 2010 Pasadena Marathon two days ago - 1001st place!  Perfect weather - cool, breezy, not much sun.

So far, I have had more fun with every race I have done - though the Iron Man Race was more exhilirating I was DQ'd after the bike ride for being too slow.

Picked up an old pair of shoes in the closet on race day, thinking, "these shoes are hardly worn, I think they'd be perfect for the race."  Unfortunately, I forgot that the reason they were hardly worn was they were a bit too small in the toe box and the sole cushion was a bit too narrow for my foot.  Never again!  The shoes have now been donated to a charity far, far away.

Met a lot of other runners during the race, kept slightly ahead of my target pace of 5-1/2 hours for about half the race until for some inexplicable reason (could it really be the shoes?) I developed huge blisters on the balls of both feet.  This slowed me down considerably - felt like I was walking on those fun packing materials that you squeeze to pop.  This meant that every time the terrain changed, I had to find a new way to walk to minimize the discomfort.  Fortunately, this was very doable.

Then, with about 2.5 miles or so to go, I got a real surprise - all of the skin on the bottom of my left little toe came off in once piece - and took with it my toenail.  That's right, my shoe must have been upset with all the pounding my overweight body was giving it and tried to tortue me by pulling out one of my nails!  Needless to say, the immediate pain was rather sharp.   At the time, I thought the pain was from a blister having broken, but there was no way I was going to let a little pain keep me from finishing the race.

I kind of hobbled the last few miles, but finished in 6 hours 35 minutes roughly.  For the first time, I had a real sense of accomplishment when I finished a race.  I also felt more comraderie with the other runners, and was in a better position to feel a sense of solidarity them - partly because I passed and was passed by the same people many times during the race, and partly because of the three out-and-backs along the course where you got to see more people.  Mostly, though, because I had more of a sense of us all being in the race together and I wasn't comparing myself to anyone.  I could just appreciate the tremendous effort that each person was putting into completing the marathon.

I was seriously tempted to stop after about 20 miles, when I saw the last two hills that had to be climbed and a medical tent close by.  Fortunately, I mentioned to someone that I was thinking about calling it quits and he said to me "You've come this far, you can't stop now."  I started thinking about how I knew that I could finish the race, and I would forever feel a sense of accomplishment while the pain of moving forward would last only a couple of more hours.

From having mentally prepared to complete an iron man race, I knew that I could finish, it was only a matter of having the will to do so.  In fact, the entire iron man experience had taken away any doubt whatsoever that I could complete the course, even with its several 300 foot elevation gains.

By the time my toenail was ripped off, there was no way I was going to stop even if I had to crawl to the finish line.  I offered my pain to God for propitiation of my sins, and contemplated how much more pain Christ was in having been mercilessly scourged on Good Thursday and then having to carry the cross and re-open so many cuts with every step on Friday.  I was able to walk on my heels to lessen the pain in one toe and the balls of my feet, but Christ had no option, as every part of His body had been cut open by the scourging.

Besides finishing, the good news is that I completely eliminated any knee pain by wearing a wrap that kept both knees warm and thereby increasing the blood flow to the area around the knee.  I'm learning something with every race.

Appellate Decision in Our Favor - Hurrah!

Received the appellate decision today in one of my cases, and we won!  Not only that, but another attorney read the decision, commented on how deserving my client appears, and gave me a pat on the back for good advocacy.  It doesn't get much better than that - or, as was once said "That's as high as a metaphysic wit can fly."

Mother of two children, one low-functioning autistic child, had support cut in half by a trial court that misapplied the law.  Felt great to have three appellate court justices agree with my client's position, and now have an opportunity to (1) obtain another bench officer and (2) obtain a more equitable result for the support of this very dedicated mother and her two children.

Really sad thing is I saw the same judge make the same mistake in several other cases while waiting for my own cases to be heard.  I was tempted to pull the self-represented litigants aside and tell them that I thought the judge misapplied the law, but decided that this was probably not allowed without their first approaching me.

Today, we made a real difference.  Hopefully, I won't sprain my shoulder trying to pay myself on the back.

Family Law is a long and winding road

This week, the privilege and responsibility of serving as an attorney-advocate humbled me several times.  I was in court or otherwise out of the office on location helping an elderly man and trying to protect two children from the bad decisions of the adults in their lives, collecting past-due support for others.  Humbled, because each case I handle affects the lives of my clients in important ways, and I am in a position to make a unique difference in their lives.

First up, another motion for a new trial from an opposing attorney whose client owes more than a million dollars in support arrears.  The apparent catalyst for the motion is that changes to Homeland Security procedures mean that one cannot leave the country without a passport.  Prior to last year, one could travel to Mexico, Canada, and many countries in the Carribean without having to show a passport.

Now that the rules have changed, the support obligor seems desperate to overturn the child support orders that so that a pssport can be obtained without having to make good on the support obligation.  Could it be that the obligor has, perhaps, hidden some money in an off-shore account?  If so, what a delicious irony that the obligor first hides all the money money off-shore to avoid paying child support arrears, then is prevented unexpectedly from traveling to get the money because of the arrears - so long, that is, as my legal research and writing is sufficient to bring the relevant law and facts to the attention of a judicial officer in a persuasive manner.

The last motion was over 1,000 pages long.  This one was a much more manageable 250 pages.  Sadly, it appears that the other attorney alleged that fraud had taken place at the trial many years ago while attaching as exhibits documents which clearly show precisely the opposite.  I seem to recall reading somewhere that if one commits perjury to falsely accuse someone of murder, the penalty should be the same as for attempted murder.  Wonder what, if  anything, the penalty will be for knowingly and falsely making an allegation of dishonesty.

Fortunately, the judicial officer to whom the case has been assigned appears to be extremely sharp and well-versed in law and motion, including evidentiary issues. 

Next, I was forced to make an emergency motion to the court so that one of my clients who had retired last year would finally be able to receive payouts from the pensions partially earned during the marriage.  Seems the opposing party was dragging feet signing off on a Qualified Domestic Relations Order, and the pension plans were refusing to pay anything out until an order  was made.  The retirement plans provide that if my client died before the QDRO was entered, the -ex would receive the entire payout.  Amazingly, the other party refused to sign the order or or make any objection to it for six months, even though this kept the -ex from receiving any of the funds either.

Once I got to court, at first the judge was reluctant to issue an order without a full-blown hearing - which would have further delayed the pension payout.  This reluctance apparently flowed from the fact that the opposing attorney had not answered the phone when I left word of the emergency hearing, and had not contacted me via e-mail, fax, or telephone to take a position - essentially voting "present" or, perhaps, "not present."  The court naturally would prefer not to make orders that affect the finances of both parties without hearing from both sides.  Fortunately, the clerk of the court offered me her copy of the Family Code, and I was able to locate and make available to the judge the Family Code section that provides that the pension plan had a 30-day waiting period before making any payments, so that the pension or either party could object.  This meant that the -ex would receive a copy of the order and still have plenty of time to object if the order was inaccurate.  Talk about pressure.  If the motion had failed, there was a good chance that my client would go belly-up financially, not to mention the added stress might be detrimental to his health.

Had the clerk not been able to see behind the paperwork to the very real issue of whether this retired man was going to survive financially, and out of sympathy offered to allow me to research some additional law to respond to the court's initial objection to the request, my client would have suffered.  Instead, the court was able to obtain additional information permitting it to make the right call.  Earlier in my career, I might have accepted the initial rejection without protest or further pleading (literally).  Knowing where to look in the Family Code for the relevant section, knowing that in some circumstances a "no" isn't final, and knowing the hardship that a rejection would create for my client, all made a difference, and so I felt that I had made a difference.

Then an early-morning meeting with the principal of an elementary school to discuss a very sensitive matter - a teacher having an affair with the married parent of a child at the school, very openly and publicly.  Surprise, surprise - the child felt awkward around the teacher, particularly since as things stand at the moment the child will be in that teacher's classroom next year.  Clearly at least one parent is at fault, as is the teacher.  Of course the child has done nothing wrong.  Who should have to move, teacher or student?

Because my client's English is not ideal, the client is rather shy, and the child has no other advocate, it was essential that I be present to explain my client's position.  Didn't hurt that I am a former teacher, so I have a bit better idea how schools really operate.  I could see through the initial bureaucratic response and point out to the principal that there were some things that could be done to protect the child, even if it was uncomfortable to impose consequences on the adults who created the situation.  Naturally, though, the principal promised to think about things, speak with various people, and get back to me.  Nevertheless, the groundwork has been laid to take further action, if necessary.

Finally another emergency hearing the same day - this one to appoint an expert to evaluate the ramifications of a preschooler stating that one of the parents had been touching the child inappropriately.  Lots of emotions, with my client repeatedly asking for an investigation to determine the ramifications, and the other party previously stonewalling.  Minor's counsel had at first objected to further investigation, but new evidence surfaced that appeared to tip the scales in favor of having a trained professional evaluate the situation.  High emotions on all sides, a fair amount of miscommunication and ambiguity about the underlying facts, and some somewhat unusual conflicts between what potential witnesses told me they heard and saw and what minor's counsel reported the potential witnesses had told minor's counsel.  Finally, everyone seems to agree that an investigation is warranted to figure out what the child is saying, what the witnesses heard and saw, and what the heck it all means.

Both parties are under suspicion - one for possible inappropriate conduct and/or supervision and the other for possible false allegations.  In my role as advocate for one of the parties, I was required to speak up and challenge the methodology and accuracy of minor's counsel, who appears to be a dedicated and caring attorney.

So, today, I am thankful that I am in this position where I can make a difference in people's lives.  In none of these situations could my clients have accomplished the results alone, each was relying on me to protect their interests.  Very humbling position to be in.

There you go again!

Be careful. Be very careful. I think I must be losing my mind!

Last night I signed up for two marathons and another Ironman for 2010.

I have no idea how I'll find the time to get ready for the Pasadena Marathon in four weeks, or the LA Marathon a month later, but I signed up anyway. If you enjoy watching geezers wheeze, show up at the finish line just before sun down and you may get a chance to watch me crawl across the finish line.